[Sender’s Name]:
Thank you for forwarding this important electronic text message to me. You are a busy person, I know, which might be why you forgot to edit the document properly. For your convenience and at no charge, I have fixed the formating, rewritten the copy, and resent the message to every original recipient.
I am sure you will agree that the edits improve the readability and enjoyment of your message. If, in the future, you find yourself without the time to properly foward your chain letters, please feel free to contact me. My rates—which can be levied by the word, message, or month—are reasonable.
Again, thank you for the chain letter. I look forward to your reply this week.
Sincerely,
[Your Name]
——MARKETING 101 (New and Improved)——
- You see a fabulous person at a party. You approach him or her and say, “I’m fantastic in bed.” That’s ONE-TO-ONE MARKETING.
- You go to a party, see a few fabulous people, and—after drinking a few adult beverages—announce to everyone, “I am fantastic in bed.” That’s MASS MARKETING.
- You see many people at a party. To meet one or two fabulous ones, you hand all of them a note that promises you are “100% guaranteed to be fantastic in bed.” That’s DIRECT MARKETING.
- You see a fabulous person at a party. You get the person’s phone number from a friend. The next evening, between 6 and 9 p.m., you call and say, “Hi, I’m fantastic in bed.” That’s TELEMARKETING.
- You throw a large party for your average friends and their fabulous roommates. You walk up to as many friends’ roommates as you can, give them your number and say, “By the way, I’m fantastic in bed.” That’s EVENT MARKETING.
- You see a fabulous person at a party. Two friends position themselves near the person, point to you and say loud enough to overhear, “That person is fantastic in bed.” That’s PUBLIC RELATIONS.
- You’re at a party and see a fabulous person. He or she walks up to you and says, “I hear you’re fantastic in bed.” That’s BRAND RECOGNITION.
——MARKETING 101 (ORIGINAL)——
>>> > Understanding Marketing
>>> >
>>> > You see a fabulous girl/guy at a party. You approach them and
>>>say, “I’m
>>> > fantastic in bed.”
>>> > That’s Direct Marketing.
>>> >
>>> > You’re at a party with a bunch of friends and see a fabulous
>>>girl/guy. You
>>> > have one of your friends’ approach them, point at you and say,
>>>”She’s/He’s
>>> > fantastic in bed.”
>>> > That’s Advertising.
>>> >
>>> > You see a fabulous girl/guy at a party. You approach them to
>>>get their
>>> > telephone number. The next day you call and say, “Hi, I’m
>>>fantastic in
>>> > bed.”
>>> > That’s Telemarketing.
>>> >
>>> > You’re at a party and see a fabulous girl/guy. You get up,
>>>straighten your
>>> > clothes, walk up and pour them a drink. You open the door, pick
>>>up their
>>> > bag after it drops, offer them a ride, and then say, “By the
>>>way, I’m
>>> > fantastic in bed.”
>>> > That’s Public Relations.
>>> >
>>> > You’re at a party and see a fabulous girl/guy. They walk up to
>>>you and
>>> > say, “I hear you’re fantastic in bed.”
>>> > That’s Brand Recognition.
