To My Daughter on Kindness

Dear Sloan,

A couple of weeks ago, a package arrived for us at your isolette. We did not know who sent it or why. We took the box home but were too busy to open it for while. When we finally did, we found gifts and treats from Graham's Foundation, an organization to help support the parents of "micro-preemie babies" with "care packages that are both practical and inspirational."

Here is the quick thank-you letter I wrote them:

We certainly didn't expect our daughter to arrive two-and-a-half months early, but the love and support from friends and family has helped us cope with the challenges. It was a pleasant surprise, however, to find a care package from your organization waiting for us at our daughter's isolette. Your timing was perfect. One day my wife was cold and hungry. Waiting in the box was a blanket and granola bars. I got thirsty and didn't want to leave my daughter. A juice box quenched the thirst. I can't wait for our daughter to come home and complete the coloring book, or take photos with the disposable camera. Thanks for putting a smile on our faces and warming our hearts. Feel free to share this message with anyone you'd like. We'll certainly share your mission with others.

Best regards,
Kawika Holbrook

The care package was addressed to "Jennifer Sloan Holbrook," which is a name your mother uses on Facebook so old friends and classmates can find her using the last name she had when she was born. My guess is the nice people at the foundation heard about you from a connection there.

Your mom has many connections helping us today.

Friends have brought us dinners so we did not have to worry about cooking. They drove your mother to visit you when she was still healing from her surgery. They offered to help move furniture or paint walls so we can build you a nursery. Your grandparents are visiting from far away just to look at you. All of this makes things easier for us and better for you.

Why are so many people so kind to us?

You do not have to look any further than your mother. She has many, many friends. They care about her not just because she is smart and fun, or because she treats others the way she wants to be treated. Your mother celebrates the happiness of everyone around her. When they suffer her compassion is deep and real. And her heart is never so full that she cannot find room for another friend.

(My mother has the same qualities, which is one reason I love them both so very much.)

One day you will disagree with your mother. You may think she is being too strict, or stingy, or smothering, or something else. When that happens, if you can, come back and read this note. The kindness so many people are showing us today is helping make a better world for you.